Weekly Rabbi’s Message for November 3rd, 2026
Shalom,
A number of years ago, a B Mitzvah student stumped me…it happens more than I may like to admit! In fact, it's common for students to try and stump me. They ask outlandish or crazy Jewish - themed questions. This moment felt a bit different. This student, Phoebe, came to one of our meetings and I could tell she had a burning question. We began our conversation and I finally said, what’s on your mind? She said, my Jewish neighbor does this Shabbat ritual and I am just not sure what it is. She went on to say that during our B’nai Mitzvah classes with her peers, we explored many different rituals, but she did not recognize this one. I asked her if she had asked her neighbor about it. She said, no, I’m a bit too shy… Then she went on to describe what she referred to as a ritual to me: He comes home from work about the same time every Friday afternoon, around 4:15 or so, just when I get home from my after school activities. He parks in his driveway, gets out of his car, she said, and as he walks to the door, he pauses and moves as if he is setting down a large box, I mean a really large and heavy box right outside his home and then enters… I know they’re Jewish because his son was my counselor at camp two years ago. As she said that, she blushed a bit. It was then I knew the real answer as to why she didn’t just ask her neighbor.
It turns out that Phoebe’s neighbor was my Religious School committee chair’s husband. So, after talking with Phoebe a bit more and getting her permission to sensitively ask Debbie, my school chair, about this behavior, we got to the answer. You see, her husband Gary had developed a beautiful ritual to move into Shabbat and the weekend with his family. He would walk to his front door and just before entering he would think about all he wanted to leave behind, or at least keep out of his heart mind and soul for Shabbat and then symbolically and simply place all of that “stuff” at the door step before entering his home…his mikdash me’at - sanctuary in miniature of his home for Shabbat.
Figuratively setting stuff down before Shabbat is a beautiful practice, and perhaps something we ought to consider at other times too. In parashat Chayei Sarah, this week’s Torah portion, this story became present in my mind. At the conclusion of the portion, Abraham dies. His sons, Isaac and Ishmael, come together to honor their father’s memory. “His sons Isaac and Ishmael buried him in the cave of Machpelah, in the field of Ephron son of Zohar the Hittite, facing Mamre, the field that Abraham had bought from the Hittites; there Abraham was buried, and Sarah his wife.” (Gen. 25:9-10)
As this first chapter of our first Jewish family concludes, we recognize that so much has transpired. We have seen challenges of famine, truth and lies, in-fighting and destruction of whole communities. Our first family wrestled with infertility, jealousy and an uncertain future. Just like our own lives, there is much baggage…or as Rabbi David Hartman taught its better to call it luggage. We hand this sacred luggage from one generation to the next. Isaac and Ishmael, as we see in the portion, appear to have “set down” their luggage.
Sure, this practice can support our embrace of Shabbat, as with Gary in my story. It also has the potential to be helpful, for it allows us to be more open, more curious. This practice can enable us to set aside the judgment we often carry into much of our lives, the pre-conceived notions and more. As we move into this week, eagerly awaiting the outcome of Israel’s election last week, and watching the results from our nation’s midterm elections (I hope all eligible reading this voted or will shortly), what do we need to set down?
Shavua Tov,
Rabbi Evon
